July 1, 2017:

After 15 years of silence my ex contacted me to complain of the difficulty of being a single parent.

I knew that already, having grown up with a mother who was a single parent.

I'm not sure what she wanted. It seemed as though she was hoping I would offer to drive her daughters to school. Or perhaps pay for a rideshare.

I did neither. I lived more than 100 miles away so driving wasn't practical. And I was unwilling to give money to someone who hadn't spoken to me in a decade and a half. I tried to be friendly, but the only help I was willing to give was career advice — which she very clearly needed and emphatically did not accept.

After three weeks she ghosted. I think, probably, when it was clear I was not going to offer the help she hinted at.

Maybe this is cynical of me. If I'm right, it was cynical of her.


She's gone again, as she was gone before, and her brief parachuting into my life makes no difference one way or the other.

Except it's changed the way I feel about her. She's no longer the kind and patient young woman who was good for me. Now she's something else, I'm not certain what. Old, maybe. Cynical, lacking enthusiasm, angry over her life choices, unhappy at the way things have turned out.

I'm glad to not be near that. And I wish her well.