June 20, 2017:

I learned with time and experience that it's not her fault.

She isn't malicious or deliberately rude. It's the severity of her ADHD.

She told me once that before Adderall there were hundreds of voices in her head. It was her own voice. It wasn't like schizophrenia where she felt other people were talking to her: it was the tornado of her own thoughts, different directions at different speeds, unable to bring a full thought to conclusion because interrupted by dozens and dozens more.

Mine was never like that. It was more about being unable to sit still, keep quiet, not bounce. Preposterous energy, leaping from one thought to the next. But always only ever one thought. One after another, preposterously quickly.

So there we are. I want to be patient with her. But it's not our chemistry.