November 27, 2023:
At the bank she walked right through a plate glass window. Two weeks hospitalized, lacerations head to toe.
Recovery was years. Constant pain. Exhaustion of Western medicine: There's nothing more we can do for you.
To her own endless shock, acupuncture relieved the suffering. That voodoo from the mysterious East.
I thought of it as: When science fails, turn to different science. She thought of it as: Utterly incomprehensible. Not even magic. Magic might have made sense. This was simply and purely baffling.
Hillbilly life in the Big ol' City.
November 26, 2023:
She took two days off. Said she was sick.
It was like skipping school. It was the first two days she'd been happy in a very very very long time.
Now she dreads the morning.
She'd loved the job. Still loves the mission. No longer has confidence in the people.
November 25, 2023:
Leibniz sped up in his last decade. He felt the sands running out. So many massive, ambitious projects.
My friend the Spinozist says, "I thought Leibniz was the enemy?" Misapplication of Althusser's "dividing lines". Lines are properly drawn between Problematics, within ouvres and inside individual works, teasing out the conflicts and unresolved contradictions. Meaningful lines cannot be drawn between named individuals: it's entirely the wrong level of abstraction. Lines between named individuals are a muscle memory of academe: the habit of institutional rivalry. It's too broad to be meaningful.
Leibniz explored the logic which Althusser later labeled "structure in dominance", in which human beings are an assemblage of monads under the direction or jurisdiction of one in particular. He defined conatus as the dynamical seed of motion or change, which appears to be the sense in which Althusser uses it and which is essentially the opposite of Spinoza's striving for self-preservation.
I need to speed up, if I'm to correct any of these mistakes.
- November 24, 2023: Open on the couch:
- November 23, 2023: Pain: physical and financial.
- November 22, 2023: In the office you introduce yourself to the well-known orchestrator.
- November 21, 2023: You swing your old blue and white VW bus backward around the poles supporting your covered driveway...
- November 20, 2023: Fat man and acid head, holding Booker T and the MGs hostage in a two-hour road movie.
- November 19, 2023: Girls' softball in ninety-degree sun.
- November 18, 2023: "Watch me fly!"
- November 17, 2023: The extra lanes make no difference at all.
- November 16, 2023: Spinning world, nausea, dry heaves.
- November 15, 2023: An old boss, an old department.
- November 14, 2023: Death on the right.
- November 13, 2023: Books on the headboard.
- November 12, 2023: I am a magnet for cops and crazy people.
- November 11, 2023: Lorde is my copilot.
- November 10, 2023: It's been a long time since I was up at 3am, writing.
- November 9, 2023: On the road between Billings and Butte it all falls together.
- November 8, 2023: All the kids in the crossing.
- November 7, 2023: "Who cares about them?"
- November 6, 2023: Trolley bro.
- November 5, 2023: High altitude.
- November 4, 2023: Old town: home at last.
- November 3, 2023: Wait, what?
- November 2, 2023: Ink, shoulder to fingertips, red ribbons on cutiepie pigtails...
- November 1, 2023: Bulk-ish Mexican bro with iPhone to his ear.
- October 31, 2023: High fire season.
- October 30, 2023: He's much, much older — and he wants a kiss.
- October 29, 2023: Your former Big Brother's adult daughter chats as she helps you pack.
- October 28, 2023: Wait — this is the wrong street.
- October 27, 2023: You should have parked closer.
- October 26, 2023: Street of houses on the summit before a very steep hill.
- October 25, 2023: Your former Big Brother is shocked that you don't have a financial advisor...
- October 24, 2023: Back in my world.
- October 23, 2023: What's that song?
- October 22, 2023: Motion: brilliant.
- October 21, 2023: Cook died here.
- October 20, 2023: The office empath declares me to be angry.
- October 19, 2023: There's a flaw in the system.
- October 18, 2023: Underground cavern inside the Gold Mine ride.
- October 17, 2023: 4,100 miles in six driving days.
- October 16, 2023: I am the KING of roadtrip junk food.
- October 15, 2023: "Actually, it is kindof clever how they punish philosophers."
- October 14, 2023: Of course...
- October 13, 2023: Highway cops in California hide from the road.
- October 12, 2023: Is there, in truth, a "will to live"?
- October 11, 2023: I wanted to study recording.
- October 10, 2023: The leadership is a cult.
- October 9, 2023: Between visits they replaced the outhouse with indoor plumbing.
- October 8, 2023: All over the midwest, all over Nebraska, all over the country.
- October 7, 2023: "So, how did you die, Mark?"
- October 6, 2023: "Count the number of trucks you encounter."
- October 5, 2023: Come down the pass on I-215 into heavy, brown haze.
- October 4, 2023: Desert exodus, I-15 South.
- October 3, 2023: The final two hours are annoying.
- October 2, 2023: Fifteen miles.
- October 1, 2023: I don't like the driving.