June 4, 2023:
Something of her ambition mimicked parodies of success. You have to claw your way to the top, or, as she phrased it to me once, "You're too nice for rock and roll."
All's fair in love and war, where the best she could come up with was to sleep with and attempt to manipulate a fat band manager who vastly outmanipulated her and reminded me of her father. "He promises to introduce me to industry people but he never does," weeping on my shoulder hundred of miles from their shared home in the period when I still believed we were friends.
This had nowhere to go. She lacked skill; her manipulativeness was transparent; she was infantile and prone to acting out. No-one trusted her and, in time, no-one wanted her around.
Yet despite all this I was profoundly, endlessly, breathtakingly shocked to learn we weren't friends at all. It's only fair to credit her that much.