July 30, 2023:
"Why do you have to play your music so loud all the time?"
Angry, impatient, confrontational. "The neighbors constantly complain to me about it."
It wasn't me, though. I'd been away at school all year. It was her boyfriend when she wasn't home, blasting — blasting — the Grateful Dead with doors and windows open. You could hear it in Long Beach.
Her brittleness, though. It wasn't about me. Or music or her inconsiderate boyfriend. She was ill. Terminal, I think. Only in her twenties. One day I overheard her weeping. Help me, God. Help me, God.
I don't think He did.